The Outcast Read online

  “Sass,” I said, leaning toward him, speaking softly, “I might not be the only one who has a penchant for trouble seeking.”

  His amber eyes flamed a moment. “You think I haven’t thought of that?” He shook his furry head. “Whatever. Never mind.” He tried to hop down from the table, but I caught him and cuddled him.

  “If you’re worried,” I said, “I’m worried.” Shenka nodded in turn, hands cupping her mug, face serious. “We’ll keep watch, just in case.”

  Sassafras’s tension eased. “Thank you,” he said. “I’m sure it’s nothing.”

  I let him go, watched him sashay his way out of the kitchen and into the hall. Shenka’s dark eyes met mine when I turned back and smiled at her.

  “He’s rarely wrong,” she said, a frown pulling her black brows together. I really needed to get her to shape mine. Hers were perfect. And shook my head at myself. I was thinking about beauty styling at a moment like this?

  Maybe he was right after all.

  “There’s nothing we can do if there’s nothing out there to fight,” I said. My coffee was half empty already and I stood to return to the pot. “But we’ll pay attention.”

  Shenka nodded as I filled a second mug. “Just in case.”

  I turned and winked at her. “For now, I’m off to bed.”

  She eyed the pair of coffee mugs with a little grin.

  “Sure you are.” She waved me off as I left the room, blushing.

  I might have been going to bed, all right. But I when I thought about the man already between the sheets, waiting for me, my weariness faded away and I hoped he had other ideas than sleep.

  ***

  Chapter Three

  I reached the top of the stairs without spilling a drop, though giggled to myself a little magic was involved to do the trick. Another soft touch of power eased open the first door on the left, leading to my old room. I peeked inside at the tiny girl under the pink covers, one hand curled under her cheek, dark hair spilling over the edge of her pillow. Sassafras perched next to her, licking his paws and blinked slowly in acknowledgment before I pulled the door softly shut behind me with another brush of magic.

  The next door down lead to a smaller room, though with the benefit of corner windows. Deep greens and golds were my son’s decorating colors of choice and I had no doubt where his desire for earthy tones came from. Gabriel slept peacefully, strawberry blond hair mussed, covers thrown askew, showing off his cartoon pajamas. It was hard to believe he was only seven years old, Ethie six already, my little family growing up around me. The giant black hound stretched out at the foot of Gabriel’s bed lifted his head with a soft groan, black eyes reflecting a hint of red fire as he licked his chops.

  Sorry, I sent. Back to sleep, Galleytrot.

  The big dog laid his head down again. Nice to see you home, Syd.

  I did my best not to wince, backing out of my son’s room and turning to the other side of the hall. Shenka’s door was closed on the far end, the bathroom entry across from Ethie’s ajar. But it was quiet and mostly dark up here still, and I felt my eyelids beginning to weigh down again at the thought of my soft, comfy bed and the warm body I could curl up to.

  Quaid was still asleep when I crept inside, muscular chest exposed where he, like our son, threw off the covers in slumber. I sat on the edge of the bed, depositing the two mugs on the side table, and looked down at my sleeping husband. I still felt breathless from time to time, in moments like this, that Quaid was mine at last. Though it was seven years later, I found there were moments when my heart swelled with old grief and worry that I’d somehow lose him again one day.

  And I would, eventually. Considering I was maji, practically invincible and definitely immortal. And Quaid… wasn’t. But I refused to linger on the fact too often. I would enjoy the time we had together, even if it meant I would someday have to watch him grow old and die. And find a way to live without him.

  I should have let him sleep, but I couldn’t resist running my fingertips over his tanned skin. The tattoo of a pentagram on his shoulder reminded me of being a teenager again, in lust for him, our power tied together. The first time I saw him without a shirt on… I drew a shaking breath and laughed softly to myself in the stillness of our bedroom.

  Oh dear. Maybe I really wasn’t tired after all.

  I bent over him, lips brushing across his, feeling his power stir as his body woke. Quaid’s chocolate eyes eased open, big hands rising to slip up my arms and pull me down, a grin tugging at his luscious mouth.

  “Morning,” he whispered before kissing me for real, big body turning me over and pinning me to the bed.

  Exactly where I wanted to be.

  ***

  I woke slowly, languidly, one arm draped over the edge of the bed, Quaid’s warm body pressed against my back. The clock flashed 8AM as his body flexed and a deep sigh ruffled my hair, tickling my ear with the heat of his breath.

  “Missed you,” he whispered.

  “You, too.” My throat tightened, the guilt returning, though I wished it would just go away. I turned over on my side, slipping my arm around his shoulders when Quaid sat up on one elbow and leaned over me. His lips traced a lazy line down my jaw and to my neck, across the top of my shoulder.

  “Nothing damaged?” One eyebrow shot up, a wicked grin on his lips as he tugged on the sheet covering me. I rolled over on my back and shrugged.

  “You might want to check and be sure.” I winked. “Just in case.”

  Quaid laughed, kissed me before nuzzling my neck. “You got it.” His gaze lifted to the end table. “Is that coffee?” The soft groan of hope in his voice made me laugh.

  “Excuse me,” I said, poking him in the ribs while he lunged past me and retrieved one of the mugs. “World’s Greatest Dad” graced the side of it, a favorite gift from the kids. “You were attending to something important just now.”

  Quaid’s dark eyes glittered over the rim of his mug as he lifted it to his lips. Bubbles emerge from the surface, steam erupting, my demon warming it for him. His lips sipped at the drink and he closed his eyes with a blissful expression.

  “In a minute,” he said. “It’s coffee we’re talking about, Syd.”

  I laughed and sat up, reaching for my t-shirt lying on the floor. A quick tug and it was on, my missing panties joining it. Decent enough just in case, I propped myself up against the headboard and drank my own newly heated coffee, shoulder to shoulder with the man I loved.

  “Drach problem solved?” Quaid slipped his arm around me, kissing my temple with his hot lips.

  “One, at least,” I said, and frowned. “Were you talking to Sassafras?”

  “About?” Quaid’s brown eyes watched me carefully as I chewed one thumbnail. His free hand rose and pulled my hand away. I flashed him a frown and resumed gnawing.

  “He said he’s been feeling off lately.” His big hand trapped mine, forced me to stop mutilating my nail.

  Quaid’s frown darkened his handsome face, scruff of beard tightening around the corners of his mouth and casting shadows. “He didn’t mention it. But now that you do…” Quaid looked off into the distance. “I know what he means. Everything is kind of… muffled.” He shrugged. “I chalked it up to boredom and peace and quiet, Syd.”

  “Maybe that’s it.” I stared down into my mug. “We’ve had a lot of that lately. At least here at home.”

  Quaid’s arm tightened. “Don’t tell me,” he mock groaned. “You’re looking for trouble again?”

  I tsked at him and jabbed him in the ribs, but he laughed, lips on mine a moment before he spoke again.

  “Syd,” he said. “I’ve learned to trust your gut, my beautiful wife. And Sassafras isn’t one to raise an alarm for no good reason.” Quaid sipped his drink. “Maybe we should be more careful. We’ve been pretty complacent lately.”

  “Not really.” I felt the need to defend our actions for some reason. “We’re warded, and in touch with other races.” One of my promises to myself when the
last mess ended was to stay in tune with what was happening around me, on this plane and others. Was I failing? But no, Shenka and I both searched, as did Sass, and we found nothing even remotely resembling a threat.

  Still.

  “Just saying,” Quaid said. “If you think something is off, it’s probably off. So, we'll be more vigilant in the next little while. Just in case.”

  I loved my husband so much.

  But I didn’t get a chance to show him the way I would have liked. The door to our room slammed open and two squealing children hurtled themselves over the threshold and onto the bed. More magic kept our brew from spilling as Ethie threw herself at her father, snuggling into his lap, a slightly more demure Gabriel wiggling his way between Quaid and me. Sassafras leapt up to the end of the bed, curling up to wait for the kids while Galleytrot padded his soft way into the room, giant head on the edge, eyes locked on our children.

  “Mom!” Ethie leaned in and kissed my cheek with a very loud suction sound before repeating her smooch on her father. Gabriel hugged me, leaning his head on my shoulder. “You’re home!”

  I stroked her dark hair back from her blue eyes and smiled. She looked just like a Hayle, but she had her father’s jaw, the shape of his nose. And she tanned way more easily than I ever did. I felt Quaid in her as much as me, despite her outward appearance, and the feeling of her demon deep inside.

  Gabriel, on the other hand, was a breath of spring air, sweet face beloved to me and more painful to look on the older he grew. I could see Liam in him, his dead father long gone. Ethie might look like a Hayle, but thanks to the power of the Sidhe and the Gate that controlled the O’Dane family for centuries, my son was literally the exact image of his lost parent.

  “I’m so glad,” Ethie said with a little huff of air. She reminded me a lot of her namesake, my grandmother. Though much more boisterous and overwhelming. I could only imagine Ethie would make an excellent coven leader one day, if only we could teach her some restraint. “We had a question to ask you.” She said it like knowing the answer would solve world hunger.

  “Ask away.” I grinned at Quaid as Ethie prodded her brother. But Gabriel looked down, shy suddenly, and his sister, as usual, just took over. I held in my need to giggle at her seriousness as Ethie leaned toward me, beautiful little face inches from mine.

  “We think it’s about time,” she said in her piping voice, power rippling around her, “you told us who Gabriel’s real father is.”

  ***

  Chapter Four

  I choked on my coffee, staring at her, all amusement gone. Quaid recovered first, tipping Ethie’s face up to his.

  “Pop-tart,” he said. “What are you talking about?”

  She rolled her eyes at him while Gabriel looked up, hopeful and quiet. “Dad,” she drew out the name, already a mistress of sarcasm at six years old. “Have you looked at him lately?” She jabbed a finger at her brother who smiled just a little, cheeks rosy. “And seriously.” She crossed her arms over her chest, tapping her fingers on her arm. “His power is totally different than ours.” Ethie looked back and forth between Quaid and me. “There’s only one logical explanation.” My daughter really was too smart for her own damned good. If she was this intelligent at six, the whole Universe had better watch out. “So, out with it.” She tossed her dark curls, sniffing. “Gabriel deserves to know.”

  I met Sassafras’s eyes and he offered a cat shrug, but no “I told you so”. It wasn’t that we were purposely keeping the truth from the kids. I just wanted them to be old enough to understand before we told them. I shook my head at Quaid and sighed.

  I totally underestimated them, I sent.

  We both did, he sent with a warm hug of power that extended around our little family. “Kids,” Quaid said, setting his coffee on the opposite end table. “It’s true. I’m not Gabriel’s biological father.”

  Gabriel nodded, playing with the hem of the sheets. “I knew a long time ago, Dad.”

  Ethie made a face. “Did not.”

  Her brother didn’t respond. He didn’t have to. She pouted and sank against Quaid as I ran my fingers through my son’s hair and ignored the fact his sister wanted to be the star of this show.

  “We did plan to tell you,” I said. “But it’s a hard story, baby. Are you sure you want to hear it now?”

  He nodded, sparks of green lighting in his hazel eyes. For the second time in a very short period, my throat tightened. I covered my surge of grief by kissing his forehead.

  I skimmed most of the details. The bigger story could wait for later. But Gabriel and Ethie both listened, wide-eyed as I told them about the past and who Liam was.

  We were all crying by the time I finished, explaining that Fate needed Liam to sacrifice himself so the Universe could continue. I wiped tears from my cheeks with the corner of the sheets, rocking Gabriel against me. “He loved me so much,” I said. “And you, my beautiful boy, are just like him. Kind and sweet and with a solid oak tree at your center. The only thing that kept me from falling apart completely when your father died, was knowing I had you.”

  Gabriel snuffled a bit then sighed. “Thanks for telling me, Mom,” he said. “You’re right. I needed to wait to hear it. Until I was ready.”

  Quaid’s big hand slipped over Gabriel’s fair hair. “You have to know,” he said, voice heavy with grief, “how much I love you, Gabe.” My son—our son—turned his head and looked up at Quaid. “I know Liam was your real father, but I’m your dad.”

  Gabriel hugged Quaid, Ethie snuggling between them.

  “I know,” our boy whispered. “You’re the best dad ever.”

  “Mom.” Ethie met my eyes, tears sparkling in her blues. “Is that why Gabriel can open gates?”

  Second jaw drop moment, this one massive. “What?”

  Gabriel leaned back and met my eyes, guilt flickering over his face. “You know, Mom,” he said, steady and sure. “Gateways. To other places.”

  But… but, I…

  Oh. My. Swearword.

  I walled up that particular part of his power years ago. To protect him and the rest of us, after Ameline forced him to grow faster than he should, used him to open the way between our Universe and the dark one lying on the other side of the divide.

  How did he manage to unblock himself?

  Gabriel must have seen the confusion and worry on my face, because he shrugged apologetically. “I know you wanted me to keep that power locked up,” he said. “When I first found the wall, I figured it protected me from something. But I had to know what it was.” His face crumpled. “I’m sorry.”

  The last thing I wanted to do was cripple my son’s abilities. Or make him feel like what he could do was wrong in any way. I’d seen the result of such control, when my friend Mia had her power walled off as a baby by her mother who was only trying to protect her. But, it made Mia weak, drove her mad in the end. I didn’t want my son to go through what the former Dumont coven leader had.

  But the plan was to wait until he was old enough to control it and then teach him. Not to have him experimenting on his own.

  Syd, Sassafras’s mind touched mine. Gently.

  No kidding. I drew a breath and smiled at my worried son.

  “I shouldn’t be surprised,” I said. “My clever boy.”

  “I helped.” Ethie clamped her lips together, eyes huge.

  I laughed and kissed them both, making my daughter squeal. “Of course you did,” I said. And sighed out my tension. What was done was done.

  “Gabriel,” I said, while Quaid ran his hands through his hair. “Can you show me, sweetie?”

  His beaming smile wiped away all of his worry, turning him into a bouncing, excited ball shaking the bed. “Sure!” He turned without warning and gestured at the air beside him. Galleytrot let out a yelp and dodged out of the way as the space where he’d been divided and separated. But not like the rifts I made in the veil. It expanded upward, forming an arch, had edges, boundaries. Like a real gate. And, on the ot
her side, a field of pale blue with a sky tinted softly green.

  “Just found this one,” Gabriel said with a grin. A small, furry creature resembling a rabbit, but with four front legs and six eyes, hopped over to the gate and sniffed the air. “Cool, right?”

  The last thing we needed was one of those creatures on our side. Sure, it might be adorable from here, but I’d run into enough trouble with critters that seemed cute and fluffy at first glance to trust this would turn out well. “Gabriel,” I said, voice shaking just slightly at how easy it was for him to do that. “Is this gate to a plane in our Universe?”

  He frowned at me while the rabbit creature shrugged and hopped away. I caught the scent of salt and something crisp coming through the gateway as my son answered.

  “Yes, Mom,” he said. And shivered. “The other Universe feels bad, so I stay away from it.”

  Heart pounding, I did my best not to swallow audibly. Which meant he remembered about the other Universe. Had likely experimented with it to come to that conclusion. I waffled between feeling like I’d failed him as a mother and coven leader and pride he’d come to this amazing conclusion on his own.

  “You can close it now, kiddo.” Quaid’s own smile was gentle, but I could feel his tension was probably about an equal to mine. Between the two of us we could have powered a city with the amount of vibratory energy we were containing.

  Gabriel looked disappointed for a moment, and my heart ached for him. His sister was so often the center of attention—if only because she demanded the spotlight—I was sure he felt this was an amazing accomplishment for him. But we really needed to hash things out and doing so with an open gate hanging out in our bedroom wasn’t the ideal situation. Sure, the rabbit thing may have been okay after all, but every world had predators. I’d rather not fight one off all over my fifteen hundred thread count Egyptian cotton sheets.